There might be a reason for my insanity

If you've known me a lot, then you would have known of my reflect saying how acceptance is drives us all. well' today it showed. Every single school day starting from this year, I get bullied (however much they would like to call it wrestling) or made fun of. No matter what I do there will be this time where acceptance is down fall. Just because I don't stare wide-eyed at FHM-ish material doesn't mean I'm gay. I mean seriously, why would I need FHM? I ain't gonna need to know how to have "sex anywhere anytime" anytime soon. Infact, if you've realised all I was trying to do in life is to make friends happier, basically cherish them. Unfortunately, people around us take things differently and mock others.

The Mid-way State with Change for you:





I can see myself in this... no not in tights of in an afro making gay gestures but trying to change myself for others... but like I said people around us see it differently.

right now, I'm thinking of my death that suicide or amnesia where I won't be there and the world 'be a better place.

Never gonna look eye to eye again, never to see that smile ever, never gonna get rid of that awkward feel people give, never gonna see the light.

worse of all, I'm just a teenager whose still doing his secondary school life...the world is merciless when it comes to judgement.



the all-seeing eye,

Geno



sup sup all,

continuing with that post I would like to show some examples, I know in today's world you'll find boys in LAN shops or wrestling or something. However I was born with stars of the 70s to 90s where antique radios and vintage television ruled. I loved the lave lamp and always wanted to play D&D in a basement with NES and the SNES. Hacking every single computer in the country and own bullies' computers. I'm also the geekish type to listen to the beauty of 8-bit music (hey seriously! it CAN get good sometimes). Have you ever seen me do any of these? I guess not well,

The Take Over, The Breaks Over - Fall Out Boy



Travis - Why Does It Rain On Me

Friends

I would like to share a theory with all of you as it seems that half of the people that surrounds me don not get the philsophy that i so USED to believe in( and I still partly do mind you).

friends
-These are the people who 'writes an unsigned contract' with you. When, you sign this contract it means that you would be there for them. for, that is what friends are for, to help you, to socialize... to die for. this is what one is willing to do as a friend to me. Even though ppl may not be willing to die for others it is still this bond between the two which makes then such ggood friends.
I'm don't mid losing my life over a freinds to savem' because my life is just nother iece of junk left at the side of the road. I don't mind being with them for it is show one's loyalty. unfortunately, I am not able to fulfil, the second requirement. it is this which separates me from you. I'm not your friend, I'm just one low person





This , as you all shoul know, is not really what's up my head, it was an instinct, but not eugene's

self'conscious unloved

sorry for the lateness

Aight,
I'm back on, well, during the first 3 days of my hols, I've found better things to do other than homework, revising, watching tv while thinking of that WTF!? moments of my life( seriously, you don't wanna see my life, EVER) , I have found my calling! LOL ok fine, I have been inspired by parkour tanceur. Its like a crazy stunt thinga mabob...




yea, and well, every night I've been thinking about what to give her, but I took my friends suggestion... Don't give her anything. Man, It's either I'm fuckin poor or I'm a fuckin asshole.(Thank god It's that I'm poor). Anyway... my alter ego tells me to show you this...

Hello fellow men, I have something to show you because I'm a geek!




And here is the song of the day:
Blur





and here is a not so old song:
love song



It really does have that feel I feel although I haven't given enough time to understand the lyrics much.

coming back to reality

Right....
Okay, I'm starting to feel better now though. but enough of that. what the hell am I gonna get her?! I mean, I have no idea what type of person she is (other than wols), but I seriously wanna get her something!! But What could have so much sentimental value, that she actually understands? I know it s really ironic to say that she is my friend, but i dont know any 'bout her. That doesn't means I'm quitting.
Right, got the report book back and amazingly passed my both of my maths but unfortunately failed my combined humans. L1r5 of 24. I'm definetely gonna work harder starting with that bloody spelling grammar which is just ^ there.(definitely). there! spelt it right (woohoo! aight, lets have a break).
I hate that sog (son of a Gun , good word to not say vulgarities), Broke my handPHONE GRR...


I'll post the music later on tonight. Cya guys D: (woops meant) :D